


Changes

by Aki (Akiko_Natsuko)



Category: Assassination Classroom
Genre: Developing Relationship, Doubt, First Kiss, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Friendship/Love, M/M, Misunderstandings, Shyness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-11
Updated: 2018-11-11
Packaged: 2019-08-20 10:14:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16553867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Akiko_Natsuko/pseuds/Aki
Summary: Their friendship is one of the few constants in Nagisa's crazy life, and he is left adrift when Karma decides to change things and its up to the red-head to prove that not all changes are bad.





	Changes

    Nagisa sighed as he stared out of the classroom window, listening to the quiet conversations around him and trying to ignore the eyes that he could feel burning a hole in his back. Knowing that if he turned around to look, he would find Karma staring at him, worry and hurt in his unusually expressive golden eyes. He had made the mistake of doing that earlier, and the sight of those emotions in the usually carefree boy’s eyes had hit him hard and yet he still couldn’t bring himself to get up and go talk to the red-head, even though he knew that he was only making the situation worse. However, for the first time since they’d become friends he had no idea how to approach the taller boy, and that scared him more than anything they had faced in this classroom.

    _Friends,_ his hands clenched under the desk as he realised that he was no longer sure if that word applied to them. It had been one of the few constants in his crazy life - stuck between his controlling mother and the madness that was his school life, and it had been something that he knew he could depend on regardless of what else was going on. He had always had trouble letting people completely past his masks and barriers, but Karma had managed to breeze in one day and had been there every day since, no matter how often Nagisa had tried to scare him off in the beginning.

    It was Karma that buoyed him after a failed assassination attempt. Karma who tutored him when his marks dropped, and who offered him sheltering arms and a second home whenever his mother got too much. The weeks when Karma had been missing from school because of his suspension had been nearly unbearable, and he had been overjoyed when the red-head had not only returned to school but also joined him in E-class. Although part of him knew that he should be upset that his much cleverer friend had ended up in such a poor class, with little to no hope of getting out again, as they were both aware of how the school system worked.

    But that had changed. No, Karma had chosen to change it. On the night that they had defeated Takaoka-sensei on the island, the red-head had dragged him off on his own once they’d made sure that everyone who’d come down with the ‘virus’ was on the mend. At first, Nagisa had merely thought that Karma wanted to check that he was truly unharmed after that fight, or to yell at him for putting himself in danger by following the deranged man onto the helipad on his own, as the red-head had looked more than a little irritated during the helicopter ride back to the hotel. Instead, as soon as they had reached an empty corridor in the hotel he had found himself slammed up against the wall, Karma’s lips pressed against his, golden eyes darkened by some undefinable emotion as their gazes met.

    He could feel his cheeks heating up just from the memory of that kiss, and he ducked his head in the hopes that no-one would notice, reaching up to press a trembling finger against his lips. Back there in that corridor, he hadn’t known how to respond, and as soon as Karma had released him, he’d fled back to their room without a word. And he’d pretended to be asleep when the red-head had appeared nearly an hour later, although he was sure that the other teen hadn’t been fooled in the slightest. Their last day on the island had been awkward and strained, and while Karma seemed to be acting like normal, he couldn’t bring himself to forget what had happened, or act as though it hadn’t changed things between them, even though he wasn’t sure exactly how it had changed or why.

    Back within their classroom it was growing increasingly hard to keep things even relatively normal, and he knew it wouldn’t be long before people noticed if they hadn’t already, and he was dreading the moment they began to ask questions, questions that he still had no idea how to respond to. He didn’t even know how he felt about what Karma had done back then, too afraid to truly consider the emotions raging in his chest, but he knew that he was running out of time. Sooner or later something was going to have to give and even if it didn’t…Well, Karma wasn’t well known for his patience, and it wouldn’t be long before he came demanding answers.

 _I can’t keep running from this, but what if everything changes and not in a good way_?

    He was terrified of losing Karma he realised - terrified of losing the one person that knew every part of him and yet didn’t judge him, who protected him when everything became too much without expecting anything in return. Nausea was creeping in with that realisation, and he wavered in his seat, knowing that he couldn’t fall apart here in the classroom. But there was also no way he could just bolt out of the classroom because others wouldn’t let that pass and Koro-sensei would realise something was off. _What do I do?_ He thought desperately, only to jolt violently a moment later as the bell went, wild eyes darting to the clock as he realised that he had been so lost in his thoughts that he hadn’t even noticed how much time had passed. Moving on automatic he rose and bowed when ordered, and then before anyone else could move he was up and out of the classroom, his bag and books abandoned at his desk as he focused solely on getting away.

**

    Karma gritted his teeth as he watched Nagisa disappear out of the classroom at a brisk pace, easily guessing that it was only fear of drawing their classmates’ attention even more than his abrupt departure had that was stopping the smaller teen from full-on running. For a moment he hesitated, debating whether it was best if he just went home, but then he shook his head - this had gone on long enough, and there was no way he was going to lose Nagisa just because he had acted on the spur of the moment. He wasn’t entirely sure why the smaller teen had reacted how he had, fairly certain that he hadn’t completely misread the signals between them, but he was determined to find out and fix it if it was possible.

    Abandoning his bag, and ignoring the curious looks and questions he pushed his way out of the classroom and took off after Nagisa. Thankfully he knew that there was no way that Nagisa would already be on his way down the mountain because it was a weekday and that meant he would try to remain at the school as long as possible so that he could avoid his mother. And given their classroom and its locations there were only a few places where he could hang out without drawing the attention of their teachers, and thankfully Karma knew all of them. He was also fairly confident that he knew which one Nagisa would go to in his current mood, and stepping out of the main building he turned and burst into a run, heading into the trees at the back of the building.

**

    Sure enough when he reached the small, naturally formed den that they had discovered months ago he caught sight of familiar blue hair and he came to a halt, golden eyes narrowed with concern as he studied the huddled form partially hidden amongst the bushes, his head buried against his knees in an attempt to make himself look even smaller. It hurt to realise that Nagisa was in that position because of him. Usually, when the smaller teen hid like that it was because of trouble at home or on the increasingly rare occasions where the taunts aimed at their class got too much for him to handle, and it was always Karma that found him and comforted him, _but this time I’m the problem. So, what happens if I can’t fix it?_

    He swallowed hard at that thought, hesitating for a long moment before he took a deep breath and crouched down so that he could crawl into the small hiding space. Nagisa’s breathing hitched slightly, telling him that the smaller teen was aware that he was no longer alone, but when he made no move to escape or protest Karma cautiously closed the last of the distance between them. Without a word he settled down next to Nagisa, shifting closer until their bodies were pressed against one another and waiting with bated breath to see if Nagisa would pull away, struggling to stop himself sighing with relief when the smaller teen stayed where he was although he didn’t relax as he normally would when they were together.

“Are you going to tell me what’s wrong?” He asked softly after several minutes had passed by in silence, realising that if he didn’t break it, then nothing was going to happen. He’d been hoping that here in this sanctuary and away from the watchful eyes of their classmates and teachers that Nagisa might be willing to broach the issue himself, but clearly that wasn’t going to be the case. Nagisa had jolted at the sudden question, pulling away from his side for a moment and he immediately missed the closeness. It was a struggle not to reach out and pull him back into place, and he only managed to resist because he had a feeling that wouldn’t go down well at the moment and there was no way he was going to risk making it worse. “Nagisa?”

“I…” Nagisa finally replied, his voice low and choked and it was clear that he was struggling to decide how to put what he wanted to say into words. Karma frowned at that realisation, Nagisa had never struggled to speak to him before, and he felt a chill settling over him as he realised that the problem might be worse than he’d imagined, and he had to fight the urge to fidget uneasily. “It’s changing!” Nagisa finally managed to force out, and from what little Karma could see of his face he had turned bright red as he realised just how loud he’d been, not that there was anyone out here to hear them.

“Changing?” Karma asked with a confused frown, having expected something a little bit easier to understand and hating the fact that for the first time since they’d become friends he didn’t understand what Nagisa meant. “What’s changing?”

“I…You…” Nagisa finally looked up at him, and Karma blinked as he took in the emotions whirling in the red-rimmed blue eyes, his eyes narrowed as Nagisa glanced away again before waving a trembling hand to indicate both of them as he added quietly. “Us…”

“Is this about what I did at the hotel?” Karma asked unsurely, in all honesty, he had expected Nagisa to turn around and yell at him about the kiss. To call him out on doing it in a public place where any of their classmates or teachers could’ve have discovered them. Especially, as Nagisa had never really got past his shyness for that kind of topics even though he spent so much time around other teenage boys that were barely able to think past those things - not to mention their often-perverted teacher. Yet it wasn’t embarrassment in the blue eyes that were now staring at him, but fear and sadness and Karma found himself floundering in the face of those unexpected emotions.

“Why?” Nagisa had spoken again before he could even begin to marshal his thoughts towards a proper answer and Karma blinked, hesitating for a moment before echoing the question, realising that he needed a better grip on the situation before he could work out what to say to fix this.

“Why?”

“Why did you kiss me?!” Nagisa blurted out, a blush spreading across his cheeks despite the hint of anger within his voice and Karma found himself getting distracted by the sight and he hastily slipped his hands underneath himself to stop himself from reaching for the other teen and making the situation worse. “Was it just joke? Why wasn’t it enough just being friends? What if this changes everything or ruins it? I…” _I don’t want to lose you,_ he finished silently, unable to voice that thought aloud when Karma was staring wide-eyed at him, and he glanced down, fearful of what he might see in the other’s expression once he’d gathered his thoughts. _Why did I say all that?_ He had meant to be more composed when they talked about this, but the thought of losing Karma’s friendship over something as ridiculous as a kiss made it impossible for him to stay calm.

    Golden eyes widened with comprehension as every clicked into place in his mind, and Karma had to bite his lip to stop himself from chuckling, knowing that wasn’t going to help matters and would probably only make the smaller teen angry at him and he knew from experience just how terrifying Nagisa’s anger had been. Hell, he had witnessed it on the island, and decided right there and then that he didn’t ever want to be the reason that side of Nagisa appeared. It had also been the sight of that side of Nagisa, and the realisation that the boy who’d always relied on him in the past might no longer need him that had finally made him act on his feelings. _I should have known that he’d need an explanation…that he wouldn’t just let things happen…_ Not that he could really blame Nagisa for being wary, his home life and school life hadn’t been the most stable, and at some point, Karma had become the stable point in his life. _And I just completely upended that…_

“You idiot…” He sighed after a moment.

“Huh?” Nagisa’s head shot up, and he blinked in shock as he stared at Karma. Of all the responses he’d been expecting that wasn’t one of them, and he didn’t know what to make of the fond exasperation in Karma’s eyes as the other teen met his gaze and held it. “What…I…” _Why don’t I understand you anymore?_ Before all this, he had prided himself on being one of the few who really understood Karma, easily able to see past the careless mask and jokes.

“It wasn’t a joke,” Karma said sternly, making sure not to look away as he saw Nagisa studying him searchingly, although he didn’t miss the hint of hope in the blue depths. “Do you realise how scared I was back on the island?” He asked softly, his hands clenching beside him as he remembered the fear that had frozen him in place the moment he realised that they’d been cut off from Nagisa - that his Nagisa was trapped on the helipad with a maniac and without a weapon to his name. It was different when they went after Koro-sensei because they knew that the Octopus would never hurt them, but Takako had been intent on not only hurting Nagisa but killing him. _I could have lost you…_

“Because I went off on my own?” Nagisa asked uncertainly, not understanding why they were now having the conversation he’d been expecting to have that night on the island but deciding to run with it in the hopes that he would get the answers that he wanted.

“Partly - but that wasn’t the only reason.”

“What else?”

“I had to watch you fight that man, knowing that I couldn’t get to you or help you,” Karma replied quietly, his gaze distant as he stared at the ground, uncomfortable with admitting any weakness even if it was to Nagisa. “I hated feeling that helpless. But it was more than that…watching as you stood over him when you won, I realised that you don’t need me anymore. “At some point, he had become accustomed to his role as Nagisa’s protector, and many of his more malicious tricks had been devised purely for use against any bullies that attempted to target the smaller boy. And the thought that his role had ended without him even realising it had caught him by surprising and left him feeling as though someone had pulled the ground out from under his feet.

“I do,” Nagisa whispered.

“Huh?”

“I do still need you,” Nagisa repeated softly, and Karma raised his head to stare at the other teen, finding himself unable to look away from the fierce blue eyes that were fixed on him.  “That hasn’t changed. I still need you…Is that why you kissed me, to make me need you?” It was a slightly more acceptable reason than a joke, but it still left an uncomfortable feeling in his stomach, and he was the first to look away.

“No,” Karma said softly, his golden eyes intense as he realised that Nagisa really wasn’t going to get it unless he spelt it out to him, _why are you so observant about everything else, but you can’t see what’s going on right in front of your nose?_  Normally he’d find the obliviousness amusing or cute, but today it was plain aggravating, and he was almost tempted to reach out and shake the other teen, to try and knock some sense into him, but instead, he decided that it was better to show him once and for all. “That’s not why I did it…” He added softly even as he began to move, thankful for their lessons in assassinations skills as he managed to inch forward without a noise.

“Then why…Karma?” The last bit came out as a startled squeak as Nagisa turned back, only to find himself staring directly into golden eyes from an uncomfortably short distance and he tried to scurry backwards, only to be brought up short as Karma grasped him by the shoulder. The hold was gentle, but it was clear from the set of his chin that he had no intention of letting him go anytime soon, and with a sigh, he held himself still. “Karma?”

“You really are an idiot,” Karma sighed, moving one hand to silence Nagisa as the smaller teen opened his mouth to protest, waiting until Nagisa had subsided before he continued.  “I was worried that you didn’t need me anymore, but I was even more worried that you would disappear because you didn’t realise how much I needed you…” His voice was barely above a whisper at the end, uncomfortable about voicing his feelings aloud. He’d thought that the kiss would be enough to convey to the other teen how he felt, hoping to avoid a conversation like this, but he wasn’t about to stay silent and risk losing Nagisa after all.

“I…” Nagisa began nervously, trailing off and swallowing hard as he realised that he had no idea of what to say as he stared at the other teen. _I thought I was losing you, and y-you thought the same?_ Suddenly the ridiculousness of the situation hit him, and laughter bubbled up his chest, and he began to giggle, and Karma could only stare at him, relieved that Nagisa was no longer crying but not knowing what to make of the laughing teen. “We’re…both idiots,” Nagisa managed to choke out a few minutes later as his giggles slowly began to subside, reaching up to wipe the moisture from his eyes, before taking a deep breath as he turned back to Karma, nearly breaking into fresh laughter as he took in the nonplussed look on the redhead's face.

    Realising that for once Karma had no idea what to say or do Nagisa sat up straighter, staring at him for a long moment as he tried to gather his courage. Although he realised that his previous fears had mainly been laid to rest, or rather proven to be utterly idiotic, he was still wary of change and taking the step that he knew that he needed to make. Karma had already taken the first one, and he knew that he needed to make the second one if they were going to properly move past his fear. Closing his eyes so that he didn’t have to see the other’s expression he closed the last of the distance between, hesitating for a moment before nearly lunging forward before he chickened out.

    He was briefly aware of their lips meeting softly, but then he realised that he’d lunged to hard and his eyes flew open in alarm as they toppled backwards, feeling Karma instinctively wrapping his arms around him as they hit the ground. This time it was the red-head who laughed, golden eyes dancing with amusement as he stared up at Nagisa who was staring down at him with a flustered expression, his cheeks burning with embarrassment.

“Idiot,” he muttered fondly tilting his head up so that he could resume the aborted kiss, smiling as he realised that this time Nagisa was responding and not trying to escape. It was short but sweet, and he couldn’t keep the happy grin off his face as they pulled apart, especially when Nagisa hesitated for a moment before curling up on his chest with a soft sigh of contentment. They lay like that for a while, Karma’s hand gradually creeping up to play with Nagisa’s hair, the smaller teen practically melting against him at the sensation and the red-head half expected him to start purring. “So is this such a bad change?” Karma asked softly, eventually daring to break the comfortable silence, letting out a soft noise of protest when Nagisa pulled away to peer down at him.

“Maybe not…” Nagisa admitted with a shy smile, making no move to resist when Karma pulled him back down against his chest and humming softly as he felt the red-head pressing his lips against his temple, just catching the barely audible reply.

“Good…”

**

     They stayed out for a while longer, quite happy to hide from the world in their private spot. Both relieved that everything was resolved and enjoying the new closeness between them. However, eventually, they made themselves move as they realised that it was beginning to get dark and they reluctantly got to their feet. Nagisa had been expecting Karma to move away a little now, and possibly even challenge him to a race back to the school to retrieve their stuff. Instead, the red-head studied him quietly for a moment before grinning, an honest grin without his usual mischief before he reached out and grasped Nagisa’s hand, the grin morphing into a hint of a smirk as the smaller teen let out a startled noise before relaxing.

“You’re stuck with me now,” Karma said teasingly as Nagisa glanced up at him, and he smiled shyly before nodding. _Fine by me,_ he thought to himself only to find himself freezing as the distance between them suddenly disappeared, and he found himself staring up into fierce golden eyes. “I mean it…I’m going to stick so close you’re going to get sick of me. I don’t ever want you rushing off into trouble on your own again.”

“Understood,” Nagisa replied softly, catching the hint of real fear before the teasing words and his eyes softened as he added quietly.  “I promise.” This time he wasn’t surprised when Karma lent down to capture his lips in a demanding kiss, and as he found himself being pulled flush against the taller teen, he couldn’t help but muse that he could quite easily get used to this kind of closeness.

_Please don’t let this change…_

 


End file.
